Written by Natasha Burke
August 28, 2020
Are you living your life to the fullest? Are you fulfilled in your relationships, work or career? I invite you to look at parts of your life that are not fulfilling to you. We are in this world to live Big, Bold, and Powerful. Life is too short to not be the best version of you.
I am going to share with you a couple of areas in my life where I wasn’t living my life to it’s fullest. I want you to know that this is an ongoing process, and as we are continually growing, learn, let go of things that no longer serve us, we can then let in new possibilities. Be compassionate with yourself as you embark on your journey. Have an open mind and an open heart. Most important, trust you and your process.
A few years ago, I found out that I had cancer. Having cancer shook my world upside down. It was also the catalyst, which prompt me to evaluate every aspect of my life. Was this easy? No, but it was overdue and it was time. I knew that I had to make changes in my life. I dug deep. I looked at my relationships, my work, my mind, body and spirit. I asked myself what was my purpose here on this planet? The bigger question was, am I living my life to the fullest?
Most of my life, I lived through the lens of others. I was insecure, a victim, I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted. I did not trust me. I was numb. There was a period of time when I turned to alcohol, which kept my pain from surfacing, but it was still there brewing. I didn’t believe I was worthy, good enough nor deserved a better in life. I lived my life fragmented. I was disassociated from my body as a way of protection. I remembered my therapist asked me, ”Where did I feel my feelings in my body?” For months I couldn’t make this connection. It was a painful process but I eventually connected with my mind, body and spirit. Pandora’s box was finally opened.
I had this ongoing feeling of there was something wrong with me, but the truth is, there was nothing wrong with me. There were situations outside of myself that caused pain and suffering and it was up to me to heal those wounds so that I could become the empowered woman I was meant to be. It was time to heal those wounds and leave them behind. I was ready to receive all the good in my life and the opportunities ahead.
I did EMDR and Somatic therapy to release the stored trauma in my body. Both types of therapy were powerful and painful but it was the greatest gift and I gave myself. I did talk therapy on and off for years but I still felt a hole in my being.
When a person experiences trauma, it gets stored into the body and if you don’t get to the root of your trauma, work through it, not just in your mind but your body it remains hidden deep down. My nervous system was always on flight or fight mode, which led to having physical issues. This is process that can help you become whole, and integrate your mind, body and spirit. It’s no fun living life half fulfilled as I did. Life is too short to not be the best version of me.
Slowly, I had a deeper understanding of myself. I was becoming whole for the first time in my life. I felt alive like I have never felt before. I was on the path of living my life to it’s fullest.
I believe that my experiences and all of the healing work I did, led me on the path to do the work I was meant to do.For over forty years, it’s been my calling to work with women from all walks of life. In my twenties I entertained being a nurse but didn’t go that route and decided to work with women in childbirth. I became a Doula, Childbirth Educator, and Lactation Specialist. My role was to support women and their partners by creating a nurturing environment filled with love and compassion throughout their childbirth experience. I was honored to be apart of their miracle in life. After years of working with pregnant women I changed my career and I wanted to work with women in Domestic Violence.
Coming from a background of abuse, I know how it affected my whole life. I didn’t feel enough or worthy, and I certainly wasn’t an empowered woman. I carried around my childhood and adult wounds that prevented me from living my life to its fullest.
Five years ago, I decided that I wanted to volunteer in my community and came across the YWCA. After I read their website and what their mission was, everything resonated with me. I knew this is where I wanted to volunteer. I wanted to make a difference in a woman’s life. I was ready to do the work I had long to do.
I took the state mandated 40-hour course and decided to facilitate women’s groups. Once a week for three years, I was committed to empower women. I had empathy and compassion for each of them, as I was once in that same situation.
I shared my experiences with them to let them know they were not alone, and there was help for them. Most important I had their back. I created a safety net for each woman. I listened to them. I heard their pain. I supported these women who had been beaten down by their abuser.
I witnessed women not knowing who they were to picking themselves up and slowly become empowered. It was important that they felt worthy, enough, and powerful so they could leave their abusive relationship. I had the honor to witness women owned their power just like I had done. This was my calling, to serve women!
After working with women for three years I realized that these women needed more tools to empower themselves.
As an author, this led me to write Women Empower Each Other, A Training Manual for organizations that work with women. My intention was to educate women around the world and this was the way I could reach millions of women.
It was a long three years of writing but I completed it.
I shared the manual with a friend of mine and she said that I should put this material into a book so that women around the world could read it. That same week, a psychic told me I will write a book and it will be successful.
I ponder and resisted this idea because I was burnt out on writing the training manual. I meditated on it. After a few days, I was clear; this is something I had to do.
My whole life, I always wanted to write a book. So here was the perfect opportunity. A year later, I Am Enough, Becoming Empowered and Celebrating Your True Self was born. I am a published author. It was a dream comes true. My book can be found in bookstores around the country, and on Amazon and Barnes and Noble online.
I remember when I sold my first book. I had self-doubt of not being good enough or not worthy to share my gift with others. I exposed myself to the world through my work. However, this was short lived. I allowed excitement to overrule the fear because I was selling my book. Even though I felt the fear, I did it anyways. I took a risk and gave it my all. Today, I have laid down a solid foundation to continue my work, empowering women. This work feeds my soul.
I invite you to be curious to look at your life and dive deep in the areas you are not living life to the fullest. I invite you to look at what is not working. Are you feeling feel stuck? Why are you feeling stuck? Are you afraid to make a change?
Ladies, what would your life look like if you took the steps to make changes? Sit with that for a while and see what comes up for you. Journal it. Are your fears preventing you from living life to the fullest? Try to get to the root of your fear. This transformational work will pay off but I warn you, it won’t be easy. Be compassionate with yourself as you do this work and begin the healing process. It’s time to release what no longer serves your highest good.
What would your life look like if you were living your life to the fullest? Visualize this. Feel it. Breathe it in. See your life the way you want it to be. Think of endless possibilities. You have control over creating the life you want. Only you can do this work. Don’t let you fear hold you back from the life you so deserve. Give yourself the gift of living life to the fullest. You are worth it!
I hope you took some tips away from this blog. Shine bright dear ones! Be heard. Be seen. Be the best version of you. Spread your sparkle everywhere you go. The world needs you!